How do I set a goal so I do not drop it after a week?
People usually drop a goal not because of weak willpower but because it belongs to someone else, is too big, or ignores whatever holds you back. A workable goal is yours (you can say why you need it), split into steps that fit into one week, and its obstacles are named in advance. Then a slip stops being a reason to quit everything.
Updated
Why goals get dropped
There are usually three reasons. The goal was taken from others: “I should lose weight”, “I should start a business”, because everyone around does it. The goal is too big and the first step is invisible. Or the plan leaves no room for fear, tiredness and family matters, and it collapses at the first hitch.
Willpower has nothing to do with it. A person with no obstacles would simply get the goal done.
How to set a goal you will follow
- Answer “why do I need this?” in one sentence. If the answer sounds like “I should” or “everyone does it”, the goal is not yet yours.
- Describe what changes in your life when the goal is reached. Not “I will be successful” but a picture: where you are, what you do, with whom.
- Split the path into steps so that each fits into a week. Not “learn a language” but “three twenty-minute lessons”.
- Write down what may get in the way: fear, other people’s opinions, lack of time. Next to each item put one small step in response.
- Decide in advance what you do after a slip. For example: I skipped three days, so I return to the smallest step instead of starting over.
What to do if the goal still gets stuck
It means there is an obstacle on the way that you cannot see yet. Most often it is a fear or someone else’s phrase that sounds before the step.
In the Ladder method the goal, the past, the obstacles and the fears are put on one diagram, so you can see where you are stuck. The free diagnostic, 10 minutes from your phone with no registration, shows this for your goal.
Frequently asked questions
How many goals can I hold at once?
One, to begin with. With five goals you do not have the strength for any of them and drop them all together. The rest can wait their turn.
Do I need a deadline?
A deadline is for the steps, not for the whole goal. A week per step is realistic and lets you notice in time that the plan is not working.
I drop it at the same point every time. Why?
The same point suggests the same obstacle stands there. Name it and make the step before it smaller. If you stay stuck for long, see a clinical psychologist.
See what is holding you back.
In 10 minutes, the Ladder shows past events, other people’s words and your fears on one map. You get your own map at the end.
Take the free diagnosticFree · no sign-up, no payment · 10 minutes · on your phone