Why do I give up on goals halfway, and how do I see them through?

Three reasons you give up

Recall the last goal you dropped and find which reason is about you. Often there are two:

• The goal is not yours. Your parents or husband wanted it, or “that’s how it’s done”, so the inspiration does not last.
• There are no steps. Between “now” and the goal there is a gap, and every day it feels like nothing is changing.
• Fear of what comes after. The closer the result, the louder the questions: what will people say, will I cope, will I lose the people close to me.

Notice the moment you give up

If you give up in the first days, the goal is more often not yours or too vague. If you give up when the result is already in sight, fear is more often what holds you: the mind brakes before something that will change your life.

That is an important hint. A dropped goal is not about laziness or a weak character, it is a sign that there is something on the way you have not yet looked into.

How to see it through

• Write the goal so that it can be checked by a number or a date.
• Break the way into steps, each of which you can complete in a week or two.
• Mark what you have done in writing: this shows movement even when you do not feel it.
• Before the last steps ask yourself: what will change when I get there, and who will it affect?

How it shows on the Ladder

In the Ladder method the goal is at the top, you are on your step, the past is below, obstacles stand between you and the goal, and fears are above the goal. If you give up halfway, it is usually one of the last two holding you.

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